On Bondage and Gaggage

It seems as though we are living in the golden age of kink these days. We know more, do more, and talk more about it than ever before. And that was exactly what got me to thinking: chatting about it with a beautiful friend. She said the words, “bound and gagged” in passing with such a delightfully accent, that I began to think of all this wonderful pastime altogether anew. “Bound and gagged” are two different practices of course, but they go together, just like peanut butter and jelly.

All except for a few oddities and ironies in words and meanings, well worth the mention here. We have the word “bondage,” but not “gaggage?” Sorry, the word doesn’t exist except maybe within certain circles of valley girls. All humor aside, the two words never seem to get equal play. You can have bondage all by itself, of course, but not so much the other way around.

Perhaps the notion carries with it a certain connotation. The gag isn’t necessarily bondage at all. It plays a separate and distinct role. Perhaps then, the two words together are less like peanut butter and jelly, but more like “icing on a cake. Or maybe a gag is more like “insult to injury,” or “the last straw,” the “coup de grâce” of kink.

Truth be known, gags serve to muffle more than mute. A girl gagged can still make a lot of noise. Even if the mouth is totally closed off, sound still can be emitted through her nose. Gags don’t close off communication either. Most gags muddle speech, but still allow it to happen.

Still, a gag can be wonderfully erotic. It can intensify feelings of helplessness and submission, even depravity, depending upon the type you choose. Almost everyone’s first choice is one of convenience, a silk scarf, or any piece of fabric tied through the mouth and around the back of the head. It will allow some form of speech, but be careful. It will also keep the neighbors awake.

Maybe that’s exactly where the fun begins. Gags allow their victims to communicate on a far more primal level. Gags encourage them to emote, reinforcing the need to communicate through primal sounds. That’s not all. They force the face to hold an unconventional, uncomfortable, and often unusual facial expression. A woman wearing a ring gag sometimes reminds me of that print by Munch. You’ve seen it, “The Scream.”

Perhaps, however, before we go too far, the most popular of all is classic ball gag. Yes, a submissive may talk a certain kind of baby talk, emote and really, really scream. Oh, and drool too.

Gags do more than force a facial expression. They can also be quite humiliating as well. Perhaps most fun is a variant of a binky, a baby pacifier. Chew toys for dogs are sometimes used. Bit gags may suggest some sort of equestrian theme. They don’t have to. There’s no rules for when and how. They can be used in any scene.

Well worth the mention is the pump gag, a rubber bladder sometimes shaped like a penis which fills the mouth, spreads the jaws, and depresses the tongue. A pump gag renders speech unintelligible and serves as a stark reminder or symbol for oral sex, objectify the wearer and his or her mouth.

Gags can also play a greater role, move well beyond bondage and create real discomfort, punishment, or discipline. Gags can be down right sadistic in a medieval sort of way. A forge welded scold’s bridle or brank was used to punish women in years gone by. They’ve seen something of a comeback these days. Isn’t this a wonderful time?

Perhaps the most important role of the gag, is not depriving the wearer of speech, not the forced facial expressions, the humiliation, or even the punishment. It’s more about reinforcing the idea of the mouth as a sexual organ. At the risk of using another made up word, “gaggage” objectifies. It “fetishizes.” It makes the wearer well aware of the mouth.

My dear friend Abigail has certainly worn more than her fair share of gags, but she is still young. There are still many more different possibilities for her to try. Personally, I can’t wait for her to show off another. At the rate she is going, we won’t have to wait for long either.

Better yet, shop the possibilities for you and your very significant other. Get your Mastercard out and your Google on. In this great golden age, you could even have one sitting on your doorstep in a plain brown box twenty four hours from now. Whatever you choose, please use the proper precautions. Be safe, sane, and consensual too.

By Smitty