PD: Please tell us about yourself

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I grew up in South London and now live in East Hertfordshire near Stansted airport.

My ultimate goal is to have my own Dungeon space which I can use for my own

personal and professional sessions, to host educational workshops, and photography

events. I would love to develop the BDSM social and educational opportunities for

people in my local community.

 

PD: How did you get into becoming a Pro-Domme?

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When I moved out of London I jumped into my local scene and loved it. I had a few

play partners that I never seemed to have enough time for. I wanted to do more of

my favourite hobby and earn some money from it. I had a scene-friend who did the

occasional pay for play and she gave me the confidence to try it. I was terrified at

first, but I loved it and just kept going. It became a great way to balance my life in

having fun and earning a living.

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PD: What is it that makes you different from the others?

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People say that they keep coming back because I am so personable and they can see that I really enjoy my job. I am kind and caring and care about the subs well-being.

 

PD: When did You first realise that You were a Dominant Female and when did that knowledge manifest itself?

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When I was five I beat up a boy in the playground. He was trying to bully me and he didn’t know who he was messing with! I felt unable to fit into the neat gender roles I grew up with and was constantly described as ‘bossy; ‘difficult’, ‘headstrong’ etc. I always took a leadership role in romantic relationships in my late teens and then finding BDSM was the inevitable next step.

 

PD: What would You say is Your prime attribute that makes You a Dominant Woman? 

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I have a low tolerance for bullshit. 

 

PD: Do Your slaves come from any particular area of society or is it a cross section?

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My slaves come from all walks of life, investment bankers to electricians.I even once had a children's party entertainer.

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PD: Do You enjoy Dominating male and female subs in the same way? Do you meet couples?

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I love dominating all sexes and genders. Couple work is really enjoyable too, I recently had a great experience with a couple who were new to BDSM and wanting to explore. I empowered the female to be more confident in taking charge and introduced them to a variety of styles of play and where they could go for more information. 

 

PD: What can a client expect when they first meet you? 

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A warm welcoming smile, a drink and a chat. I like to converse as people first and foremost. Get a sense of who they are outside of BDSM. Foster a connection and put their nerves at ease.

 

PD: What kinds of punishments do you use? 

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That’s a wide, wide question, It depends if it is punishment or “funishment” – depending on their kinks and interests, it can be corporal punishment, time outs facing the wall, it can be a verbal dressing down, or bathroom refusal. In truth I don’t like to “punish”,  I prefer positive reinforcement as a training tool or behavior modification.

 

PD: What is Your favourite fetish?

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I have many, many activities that I enjoy. What they all have in common is putting them into subspace. When you can see in their eyes that they are utterly yours. It’s the focus on me, and the removal of their outside world. But I also really like OTK spanking and weeing on people, so there’s that too.

 

PD: What does a D/s relationship look like to you? 

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It depends on whether it is a personal relationship or professional . Both however,

should be based on good communication, honesty and a willingness to explore a

power imbalance.

 

Darkside: If someone asked You to take them past their limits,

would You?

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Generally no, with the exception of a regular trusted submissive. Explicit

permission would be in place and I will not knowingly cause them long term

physical or mental harm.

 

PD: How important is after care to You?

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Paramount. Not all subs need or want aftercare, but I prefer the ones who go

deep into subspace and need a few minutes to readjust themselves back to real

life. Having a casual chat about the scene and what they liked or didn’t like, while

I clean and put away equipment is a really lovely way of ending things. If it was

particularly heavy I also make a point of saying that they can contact me anytime

if they experience sub-drop. 

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PD: Is there anything that You haven’t done within the BDSM world

that You wish to?

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There are always new things to do and new people to pervert! I haven’t yet done

the Cruel Huntress – a full day of hunting subs in a private woodland with

paintball guns. It appeals to the primal nature of my domination, chasing,

capturing and owning my prey.

 

PD: How do You perceive the “lifestyle” as being viewed in

mainstream society? 

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People outside my kink social circle find it baffling. I haven’t had any really negative reactions but then I gravitate towards open minded people in the first place. I think most think it’s just ‘sex games’, like foreplay, they don’t see that it can be so much more.

 

PD: How do You feel about the way that Pro-Dommes get portrayed in the media? 

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I find it amusing but I don’t pay too much attention. There seems to be a range of portrayals, from criminals to sex-crazed psychiatric cases, to various forms of strippers or escorts. Each of them probably has a grain of truth. I quite liked the Netflix series called Bonding. Not everyone thought it was a good portrayal, but I really enjoyed it and didn’t have a problem with it.

 

PD: Besides your love of all things domination, what are your other great passions in life?

 

I’ve been studying for an alternative ‘plan B’ career for the past year or so. It’s properly nerdy and I’m really enjoying it. I spent last winter volunteering at a local homeless shelter and I’ve done charity work on and off for the past 10 years including working with a patient support charity and a transgender rights movement

 

PD: If you were not doing this, what other career would you like to have? 

Sometimes I think I should have been a detective for hire, a bit like Marvel’s Jessica Jones but without the super powers and alcoholism.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or I should have been a vet. It’s a tough call.

 

PD: What satisfies You the most about being a Mistress?

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Having the kind of kink play that I want to be having, pretty much on tap, AND being paid for it. There are also subs where I feel like I’m genuinely helping them live better lives or work through some personal issues. It’s rewarding.

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PD: What is your personal motivation to work as a dominatrix/model?

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I like being my own boss, doing the work I want, when I want. The flexibility and freedom suits me.

 

PD: Anything else you would like to mention?

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I feel like society is generally a lot more liberal and open minded about alternative sexual practices and lifestyles, but it’s still surprisingly difficult to make a career in the industry. For a start, banks and payment processors have a problem with sex work despite it being legal. Many apps actively shut down accounts they suspect are connected to legal sex work. I was once declined a business bank account with no explanation when I described my business as online adult modelling. OnlyFans is increasingly more hostile towards adult performers despite it being built on the back of the porn industry. 

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It’s frustrating that in the 21st century, when attitudes are becoming more liberal, that we still have these archaic terms and conditions from payment processors. Preventing fraud, money laundering and sex trafficking are of course all important, but creating a hostile environment for all legal sex workers isn’t the answer, and just perpetuating the marginalization of  an already marginalized group.

 

Discover more about Ms Freya here